kingdomcomes | [OPEN] painting the white roses red

Who: Remus and you!
What: Doing his chores like a nice, obedient Apprentice ought to.
When: Saturday, 1/6, all day
Where: In the castle
Warnings: Likely to be NSFW!

A. THEY CALL IT A MESS HALL FOR A REASON.

After breakfast this morning, Remus finds himself tasked with the arduous job of cleaning up after everyone, apprentices, guards, and visiting nobility alike. It's his turn on the rota, and he's not complaining when there are certainly worse jobs, but it does have its downsides. Like mopping up puddles of porridge and egg splatter and bacon grease.

Like slipping in a puddle of someone's cold, spilt coffee and landing flat on his back.

"Merlin's—!" Remus cuts off with a low groan, swearing under his breath, and pushes himself up to a sitting position. Glancing around to see if anyone was around to bear witness to his struggle, he gives you a half-grin.

"Mind pretending you didn't see that?"

B. COCK DEFROSTING: DOES NOT INVOLVE BUTTERCREAM

When the Mistress tasked him with 'defrosting her cocks,' Remus had been skeptical, to say the least; admittedly, he wasn't quite sure what it entailed, but it couldn't be any more embarrassing than any of the other chores he's been dealt, so he agrees readily.

As it turns out, some of the door knobs in the upper levels of the castle, where it's more drafty and susceptible to cold, have more or less frozen over, to the point of making the rooms behind those doors inaccessible. It falls to Remus, armed with a mop, bucket, rags, and a magical self-heating kettle, to gently and oh-so-tenderly pour warm water over them and massage some life back into them, and then mop up afterwards. Which, alright. He can manage that.

Glancing up at passersby, he grins and chuckles. "Seems these things require a little more care than I thought."

C. WILDCARD

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"Uh...thanks?"

He really can't tell if she's serious or not, so he gives her a nervous grin. It morphs quickly into a laugh, though.

"I lived in a dorm with six other boys for seven years. Trust me, I get it."

She joins him in laughing, and shakes her head. "We had boys like that, from time to time," she tells him, in a tone of confidence. "But they took instruction better than these guards, for all they are grown men and women. Then again, I suppose that in Edoras, I had some weight behind my words." There's an edge of bitterness to her smile now. "I saved shouting against the wind for more weighty issues."

"Boys are like that everywhere, I think. But really, once you're an adult..." Remus shakes his head. "There's no excuse."

Someone tell that to Sirius Black.

"I think that's very wise of you, though." Remus straightens up and goes back to mopping again, being a little more careful of his footing this time. "Knowing when to speak and when to save your breath is hard."

Éowyn smiles wryly, leaning against a nearby table. "And a skill I have rarely been accused of." Especially around here. She has a niggling feeling that there's no point in speaking out here, and yet she keeps doing it, whether she will or no. It's just not in her nature to let things go. "Would you like some help?"

"Well, how else are you supposed to accomplish anything around here?" Remus laughs, and then raises his brows at her offer of help.

"...You sure? It's very dull work."

"I have two hours until my next patrol," she replies, with a little shrug, and holds a hand out for the broom. "As for dull work, I am no stranger to it. Sooner that than idleness, and it will be sooner finished with two in any case."

"...Well, alright. I can't say no to that." He hands over a broom and resumes mopping up a mess of porridge on the floor. "Couldn't get either of my best mates to help, unless I threatened dismemberment."

She lets out a little snort that might be laughter, taking the broom and rolling her shoulders before she starts sweeping. "Perhaps you should try that, then. No sense in labouring on alone."

"Well, they've got their own chores, too. Some of which I'm sure are vastly preferable to this, and some of which I'm not sure I'd want to go near. Actually, perhaps I should propose a trade."

She smiles, shaking her head. "How bad can it be?"

No, really. She's curious.

"Well, my mate Sirius has told me some of the punishments he's been assigned by the Mistress. Stuff like...cleaning her boots. With, er."

He shudders.

"His tongue."

So that's a determining factor.

Éowyn grimaces sympathetically. Disgusting, she can handle. Humiliation, though, especially of that stripe...

(Unwanted memories of the time when she was infected surface, at the thought of that kind of humiliation. She pushes them back down, very firmly.)

"At least our duties are more clearly-prescribed. I think I chose well."

"Yeah, me too. Mopping up slop is vastly preferable to...that."

The freaky shit. Remus Lupin is not here for the freaky shit. Not yet.

Éowyn nods fervent agreement, and her nose wrinkles a little in distaste.

"She has an odd idea of punishment," she says at last, grudgingly, "but a most effective one, it must be said." After all, they're both reacting this way. That suggests it works.

"My thoughts exactly." It's why Remus has striven hard to stay on the Mistress's good side.

Grimacing, he bends down and picks up what looks like a banana peel, except black and greasy and smothered in various other foodstuffs.

"Who does something like this? Just leaves it there? For at least a week!"

Éowyn's expression of disgust speaks volumes. She grunts, and goes back to sweeping with renewed vigour.

"Animals," she mutters, and shakes her head. "I have never wished so dearly to eat elsewhere."

Remus wrinkles his nose and chucks the thing into the bucket he's been using to collect un-moppable stuff.

"Makes me think we should have a picnic out of doors when the weather gets nice again."

"Perhaps we should." She sounds genuinely interested by the idea. Picnics haven't exactly featured heavily in her life - eating outdoors, yes, but considering it a picnic, no - and it would be interesting, she thinks, to try. "The outworlders, at least."

"Yes, exactly! It'd be a good way to get to know each other a little better, and perhaps...perhaps everyone could bring something from their home world to share."

The more he thinks about this, the better an idea it sounds. What could possibly go wrong?

"So long as we are very careful that none are tampered with." Look, she's kind of wary about other people's food here, for some odd reason

She's quiet a moment, sweeping dutifully, and then she looks up again. "And if Kaphlar Kinra shows his face, then I will not be held responsible if I punch it."

"Don't worry," Remus chuckles. "I'll ensure there's a thorough screening process."

He pauses, and then lets out a nervous laugh. He's pretty sure she's not joking.

"Fair enough. I won't try to stop you."

[OPEN] painting the white roses red

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