"You don't need to be all honorable. It's okay to want someone to put in the hours for a fine gift for you."

John is right, he would absolutely do it. Being told no is of little consequence in this scenario, too. If anything, it's just gasoline flicked onto the ol' shit fire.

Dave raises his brows when John suggests leaving so soon, but he doesn't question it. He had noticed that John had been enjoying birthdays less and less in later years. He mostly figured that birthdays were getting kind of same-ish. There was a lot of them, after all. It's a lot of cake and shit to deal with on a near monthly basis.

Not to mention, it's sort of symbolic of how weirdly peaceful life had become. That they could just sit around blowing out candles and dressing up. It makes you restless.

So, he doesn't argue, he takes John's prompt and he stands up. "I think they'll be disappointed when they realise you didn't eat a dick." He points out, but he's not wild on taking a slice either. Instead, he makes sure to grab that glass dildo with gusto. "Hey, don't forget this." Now he's going to press it against John's cheek.